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  • Barbara Clayton Price

SEQUESTERED PSYCHOTHERAPIST

Day 59

I gained six pounds this past week! I stepped on the scale this morning and couldn't believe my eyes. How the heck did that happen?


I do remember eating that pint of ice cream, with homemade chocolate sauce one night. I think I recall eating a really large plate of nachos a few days. Oh, and I decided to buy a box of wine instead of a bottle, because I thought it would last longer. Yep, I think I may have made a poor choice there. I was going to that well a little often at night, while watching Netflix, and the darn box always looks full. The thing is, when I drink a glass of wine it makes me hungry, and NOT for broccoli. Soooo, there may have been a few nights this past week, where I was eating cheese and crackers along with my wine and a bowl of chocolate chips after. Do you remember eating cereal and having milk left in the bowl? So, then you added more cereal, only to realize that you added too much cereal, so you poured in more milk, and so on, and so on? That's sort of how my nights with wine with cheese and crackers could go. I guess I know how those six pounds happened alright.


I belong to Weight Watchers and I've been a member for years. I joined again a few years ago and I love my group, as well as our instructor. I've made friends in this group, so it's fun to go to each week. I've been successful in losing some weight and keeping it off for the past few years. Like many other businesses during the pandemic, WW has gone to virtual meetings. Now, we meet on ZOOM each week, and it is always so good to see my friends. Thank God, I'm still going, or I wouldn't have weighed in this morning. Six pounds in one week! YIKES!!! The good news is, that if I weren't going to my meeting tonight, I probably wouldn't have stepped on that scale at all. At least now, I can see what the results of all my blind, Covid couch potato eating has cost me.


I TOTALLY understand, why I've been eating without any regard to my health. I also understand why I'm going to quick, easy to prepare foods, instead of my usual cooking healthy foods. Everything right now seems too big to handle. I also noticed this when listening to my clients yesterday. Even the simplest things felt like mountains to them. I knew exactly what they were talking about, because I'd been feeling the same way. It's because the pandemic is going on so long, and things are the same, and very little is fun or exciting anymore. Choosing unhealthy, easy, high carb food is much easier, than standing in my kitchen, preparing a healthy meal. I have always loved cooking and regularly prepared great, healthy meals for myself.. but not now. I'd actually been wondering for the past two months, why this was happening. I'd walk into the kitchen to cook something, and it just seemed like too big a task, to actually get out a pan or chop or clean food to eat. Chips and cheese was winning, because it was a quick, easy to make, and throw into the microwave.


I meet with my WW group tonight, and I'm sure that there will be many others, who are struggling with issues the same as mine. It seems like, almost everyone I talk to is conscious of weight gain right now. It's so understandable, why we are reacting the way we are right now, but we must try our hardest to be aware of the consequences, and try to improve our results. Keeping our immune systems in good shape is so important right now more than ever. We are all in this together, so we need to help one another. My sharing this six pound gain helps me to process why it's happening to me, but I hope that it may help others to see that they are not alone, in this battle of the bulge right now. Don't ever berate yourself for having gained weight or your weight in general. It's one thing to be aware, but it's quite another to hate yourself as a result. The more you are angry about weight gain, or how you look, the more you will eat poorly. Give yourself grace right now, for having gained a little weight. Don't beat yourself up. Just try your best to take good care of yourself in every way, as many days as you can. Maybe having a dish of ice cream instead of a pint, or making soup instead of chips and cheese will help. I'm going to try to make as many days as possible, healthy days this coming week. I'm not promising that there will not be a wine and cheese night, or an ice cream day. I'll just take one day at a time, and try to do better keeping myself healthy. The sun is out today so who knows, I may even take a walk.


Stay safe and remember that this won't last forever.

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